Supporting Your Child as they Begin their Learning Journey

You’ve dropped them off with bleary, tear-filled eyes on their first day of primary school. How did they get so big so quickly? And how can I support them in their education as they begin to learn to read, write and count? Supporting your child’s Literacy and Numeracy development need not be complicated or time-consuming. Here are 6 teacher top tips:

1. Read for enjoyment. I cannot stress this enough. Children need to see reading as something which is exciting and enjoyable, otherwise reading homework will become a chore very quickly. It’s great to get into a routine of reading together every night before bed. Not only does this boost their Literacy skills, but develops relationship and sets a calm relaxed tone before bed.

2. Revise phonics sounds. Often this is the thing that can scare parents the most - ‘It’s not the way we learned it at school.’ But phonics doesn’t need to be scary, if 5 year olds can do it, so can you! Think about the sound the letters make in words. Your child will likely be able to tell you how they pronounce the sound in school. Practise matching the sound to the corresponding letter. Then practise putting 3 sounds together to make simple words. Our 3 Sound Words Spelling Box focuses on these early phonics skills. With colourful magnetic letters and engaging games, your child can develop their new skills in a fun and engaging way.

3. Look out for real life Numeracy. Point out numbers around you eg. on house doors, packaging etc. Talk about the numbers, which is bigger, which is smaller, which number comes next. Practise counting different items. Talk about the time and link this with different types of clocks. Children learn best when what they are learning is linked to their real-life experiences. It gives their learning purpose.

4. Use visual aids to support their homework. Our Numeracy Toolkit was designed with this in mind. It is the perfect homework companion with bright, colourful visuals which help children develop their understanding of key concepts. It also contains interactive addition and subtraction frames to engage children’s interest.

5. Don’t overwhelm them with questions at the end of the school day. Children will understandably be tired at the end of a school day. Allow conversation to flow naturally later in the day rather than bombarding them with a list of questions as soon as they get into the car. 

6. Let them learn at their own pace. Children will flourish in their own time. They have different strengths and not all children learn at the same pace. Avoid comparing your child’s progress to other children. This is not helpful for you or your child. See your child as the individual that they are and support them where they are at.

If you aren’t sure which resources are best matched to your child’s ability, contact us and we will be happy to point you in the right direction.

Boosting Your Child’s Education Through Games

Have you ever seen engaging activity ideas to enhance your child’s literacy and numeracy learning on Instagram? So you save the video with good intentions, only to realise that they require lots of resources and take longer to set up than your children will actually spend engaging in the activity. We all want to help our children develop their literacy and numeracy skills, but time comes at a premium and let’s admit it, we are all tired!

This is why I created Clever Kit Learning Boxes. To take the mental strain away for parents. Providing convenient, ready made resources to support your child in their homework that are matched to the Northern Ireland Curriculum. They are trustworthy - made by an experienced, practicing teacher.

Here are 4 resources to support your child’s learning at home:

1. Numeracy Toolkit -  Our best seller. This kit is designed to be your buddy through maths homework. It contains bright, colourful visuals to help children with facts and calculations. Also including interactive clocks, place value charts and addition/ subtraction charts. Every box has a QR code, leading you to a webpage with further ideas to get the most from your kit.

2. Spelling boxes - These boxes are designed to make early phonics fun. They are packed with colourful, interactive games to help little ones practise their emerging phonics skills: with no preparation required! There are two levels: 3 Sound Words (P1) and 4 Sound Words (P2).

3. Times Tables Box - Ideal for children in P3 and P4 who are just beginning their times tables learning. Focusing on the first times tables children learn - 2, 5 and 10.  Having a sound knowledge of these will set your child up for success as they go on to learn to more difficult times tables in subsequent years.

4. Digital Downloads - For when you want a quick printable activity for your child to practise their skills. Our booklets are affordable and can be downloaded instantly. Available for times tables and spelling.

What resources would you like to see? We are always keen to hear from our customers as we seek to develop more products to support your child through their education. Get in touch with your ideas - you can message us through our socials.

7 Ways to Keep Up with Learning over the Summer Holidays

I don’t know about you, but I begin every July with wide-eyed optimism. I have big plans to do lots of activities with my kids, to go on lots of days out and do a few educational activities with them. By then end of August, I’m usually looking back, thinking, ‘where did the time go?’ Realising that I haven’t done half of the activities we planned. We can put so much pressure on ourselves to keep up with our children’s education during the summer months, but often we don’t know where to start and are met with opposition from our kids - they are off school, why would they want to sit down and do a workbook? But learning isn’t confined to formal workbooks. There is a wealth of learning to be had outside of the classroom in the context of family time. Here are 7 ways to find learning opportunities in the summer months.

1. Keep reading. And I don’t mean just reading novels or school reading books. Use the topics that your child is interested in to get them into reading. There is a wealth of books out there on many topics including Lego, Pokemon, Barbie, farming, dancing, animals. Magazines are a great way to get your child reading without the formality. My son loves planes, so he and his Dad read aviation magazines together. He loves getting this time to spend with his dad and doesn’t even realise that he is developing his reading skills.

2. Write a summer diary together. Every year, my son’s report says, ‘keep writing over the summer’. But when I try to follow through on this, I’m met with resistance. So I bought him a notebook and now we keep a summer diary, where we write and draw about our adventures during the summer. Not only is it developing his writing skills, but it will serve as a memory to look back on in years to come.

3. Write postcards to family. When we go on holiday, one of the first things my son loves to do is write postcards to his grandparents. This old fashioned tradition seems unnecessary in our digital age, however, it not only develops his literacy skills, but there is so much excitement in sending something from another place, to find it arrive at home with the people you love the most.

4. Budgeting their pocket money. Real life learning is the most valuable type of learning. So when your child gets their regular pocket money, talk to them about budgeting. Then help them plan what they need and want to spend or save - a skill that will stand by them into adulthood.

5. Baking or cooking. Not only is this a great relationship-building activity, but there is so much learning in following a recipe and weighing ingredients - plus you get a yummy treat at the end of it all!

6. Educational games. Keep learning in the summer months lighthearted. Our learning activities are designed to make learning fun and engaging through colourful board games which your child can enjoy, without the pressure of putting pen to paper.

7. Remember the summer is for rest. Whilst it is good to keep your kids learning, it’s also good to teach them to rest. With childhood anxiety on the rise, it’s important that children not only learn to work hard, but also learn to rest. 

Have you got any summer ideas worth sharing? Tag us on social media @cleverkitlearningboxes 

6 Ways to Enjoy Half Term Together and Ditch the Screens

With half term almost upon us, every parent’s mind will be turning towards how to keep their kids entertained for the next week and avoid bickering as much as possible. For many of our kids, screens can be a go-to for them in their down time and they will be looking forward to some extra screen time while they are off school. I want to put it out there that I have no issue with screen time - TV and iPad time happen daily in our house. However, I don’t want the majority of our time together to be spent looking at screens. When my kids are older and they look back at their childhood, the relationship building memories they treasure will be the times we spent together, away from the screens. Here are 6 simple ideas to inspire you this half term:

1. Get crafty - Of course I am going to suggest craft, it’s my thing. Get on Pinterest and look for ideas of easy crafts that can be made from recycling. I am forever finding toilet roll tubes, tissue boxes and plastic bottles that my son has stored up for his next creation. Also check out our range of craft boxes available on our website.

2. Make your own board game - I often get the kids in school to do this. Not only does it develop their imagination and problem-solving skills, it also creates an activity that can involve everyone in the family and doesn’t cost anything to make! All you need is paper and pens. You can borrow dice and counters from other board games which you may already have in the house.

3. Make a treasure hunt - Hide some treasure in the house or garden. Make simple clues or rhymes to follow, even draw your own map.

4. Play Ready Steady Cook - Remember the TV show from years ago? Raid the cupboards and give your kids a few simple ingredients and see what culinary creations they can come up with. They will love watching you taste their food (good or bad)!

5. Have a camp out in the living room - We did this a couple of years ago by accident. We planned to go camping but there was a problem with our tent. Having promised our son a camping trip, we decided to camp on the living room floor instead. We put out inflatable mattresses, sleeping bags and torches. We drank hot chocolate and ate marshmallows. He still talks about the night we camped indoors and asks when we will do it again. Plus it’s a win win if you’re like me and like to be warm and cosy rather than sleeping outdoors!

6. Do a talent show - This was one of my favourite activities as a kid. My cousins and I would all perform our “talents” for the grown ups and put on our very own concert. We may not have been worthy to perform in the Grand Opera House, but we certainly had many laughs and made great memories.

Guest Blog -Stork Bundles: Simplifying Parenthood with Convenience by Lauren McNeill

Parenthood is a beautiful journey filled with love, joy, and countless precious moments. However, it also comes with its fair share of challenges. As a small business owner and a mother myself, I understand the unique experiences and joys that come with balancing these two roles. At Stork Bundles, we understand the needs of parents and strive to make the parenting experience easier, more organised, and more convenient. In this blog post, I invite you to explore the world of Stork Bundles and discover how our thoughtfully curated bundles can simplify newborn life.

Convenience at Its Best:

1. We know that busy parents need practical solutions. Our bundles are designed with convenience in mind. You'll have everything you need to help you through those first few months of your newborn baby's life.

Organisation Made Effortless:

2. Say goodbye to the days of rummaging through a messy nappy bag. Our Stork Bundles travel changing mat is a game-changer for busy parents. Keep your baby essentials neatly organised and easily accessible, whether you're at home or on the go.

Eco-Friendly Choices:

3. We believe in nurturing not only our little ones but also our planet. That's why our bundles include eco-friendly materials. By choosing Stork Bundles, you're making a conscious choice to contribute to a greener future for your child. Sustainability and style can go hand in hand!

The Perfect Gift:

4. Looking for a thoughtful gift for a new parent? Look no further! Stork Bundles offers beneficial gift bundles that are sure to impress. From baby shower essentials to newborn starter kits, our bundles make it easy to give a present that will be cherished and appreciated.

Parenthood is an incredible journey, and at Stork Bundles, we're here to make it a little easier and more organised. Our range of thoughtfully curated products combines convenience, functionality, and eco-consciousness without compromisation. Explore Stork Bundles today and discover how we can simplify your parenting experience while adding a touch of elegance to every moment.

Remember, parenthood is beautiful, and with Stork Bundles, it becomes even more extraordinary.

Visit our website at www.storkbundles.co.uk and embrace Stork Bundles today!

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Guest Blog: Dyslexia - Swimming Through Confusion by Anne-Marie Beggs

Is your child unhappy in school? Are they consistently sick?

For those of us who work with Dyslexic individuals we know that what they complain about most is confusion.

If you’re a Dyslexic child, a single class can give rise to feelings of chronic confusion: making individuals sick to their stomach, migraines, and frustration and isolated.

As they sit in the classroom and look around, they wonder why everyone else is smiling.

Why does everyone else look happy?

They don’t look sick! Or have sore heads!

They feel so isolated, alone, and not intelligent.

What gave rise to the confusion?

Children have no idea why they are confused, or what is causing the confusion.

For them it’s like swimming across a lake and not having learnt to swim.

They don’t realise that all our brains are different, so we all think differently, and we all learn differently.

So, in our classroom we see our 8-year-old Emily with her pal Jack sitting next to her, they are great friends. They’ve been friends for years so they know each other very well. Apart from one important fact, Jack’s brain works differently: he’s a word thinker, he loves words’ he loves reading, so school is the perfect environment for him.

Little Emily doesn’t realise she’s a picture thinker, its’ her fantastic ability to think in 3D that’s causing her confusion. She just thinks she’s not as smart as Jack. Don’t let your child or yourself swim through school and life without the tools to do so.

This explains in very simplistic terms why some children feel uncomfortable in school. But the confusion and frustration grow the longer the child is in school. If you imagine sitting confused all day every day because you can’t access the curriculum. One of my colleagues based in the UK who is dyslexic herself said school for her was awful!! She went everyday she never learnt anything because she felt the teachers were speaking a foreign language!!

That’s because the dyslexic mind functions differently. If you imagine the brain is like a filling cabinet full of files which contain information.

The word thinkers mind has files full of words. When they read their brain matches the words on the page with those in the filing cabinet and then creates a picture to match this in turn creates understanding.

The picture thinker’s brain is made up of pictures their thinking flows in the opposite direction. When they encounter a word, their brain searches in its filing cabinet for a picture to match the word, if there is no picture in the filing cabinet then the result is confusion! The words that cause the most confusion are what we as Davis facilitators call trigger words, because they create a blank space in this persons thinking. These words are sometimes referred to as sight words/or the dolch list.

The system myself and my colleagues use fills in these blanks spaces with images created in clay. The beauty of this system is it allows the picture thinker to flourish, when they read their filing cabinet is now full of pictures created in clay. When they read their brain sees the word, they now have a picture to match that word so their brain says OK I know what that word means. I have a picture and a word that match, this creates a knowledge base to allow the person to understand the content and therefore enjoy reading.

This is a brief over view of Dyslexia with regard to confusion with words, as a Davis Facilitator this is only a single strand of our work, but a very important part of it. If you would like to learn more please get in touch.

If you are interested in purchasing my book, “A Bridge Between Two Me’s” it’s available on amazon kindle for download right now.

Or for the hard copy which is on prelaunch use the code; clever22

Any questions please contact me:

One to One Tuition - The Paragraph Challenge

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Give them tools to help them “to create a life they love”

7 Easy Ways to Encourage your Children to Look After the Planet

With warnings about climate change and pollution becoming stronger and more frequent, our children are facing a real responsibility to be eco-conscious in their day to day living. This generation are being educated to look after the planet in a way that no generation before has been. They see looking after the Earth as a way of securing their future and feel a personal responsibility to do so. Although we don’t want our children to live in fear of the future, we do want them to make choices which will positively affect it. Here are some easy ways in which you can encourage your little ones to look after the world around them. 

1. Involve them in household recycling. When children are involved in the process of recycling, they can take ownership of it. This also helps them to establish good habits for the future. Get them to sort items into different categories and talk about what can and can’t be recycled. Involve them in taking out the weekly bins and going to the local recycling centre.

2. Discourage children from cheap, single use toys. Children are bombarded by cheap promotional items constantly such as free toys in magazines or kids’ meals, class prizes and bubble wands. These are designed to be tempting to children and are fairly successful in doing so! However, these are devastating to the planet. Kids play with them for a matter of minutes then they are thrown away and lie in landfill for hundreds of years. Talk to your children about the impact these have on the planet and encourage them to think carefully about which toys they choose.

3. Buy second hand toys. The majority of toys are made from plastic, which will hang around our planet longer than we will. Look out for toys on second-hand sites or charity shops, you will be amazed by what you can find! Not only will this encourage your child to live a more sustainable life, it will be easier on your pocket!

4. Read stories that explain climate change and pollution in child-friendly terms. This is one of the most effective ways to get the message across. There are so many great books out there such as Somebody Swallowed Stanley by Sarah Roberts and Usbourne Looking After Our Planet.

5. Spend time in nature. If children love nature, they will naturally want to protect it. Build a bug hotel in your garden with sticks and stones. Go for walks in local parks, forests or beaches- look out for wildlife and different types of plants.

6. Grow your own food. I am not a gardener by any means. However, I have been growing strawberries with my little one for a couple of years now. He loves taking responsibility for watering them and is so excited every June to eat the fruits of his labour. We also have a herb garden where he loves to smell the different herbs and pick them to use in cooking our dinner. We chose strawberries and herbs because they require little maintenance/ space and are easy for a 5 year old to look after.

7. Turn off lights and taps when you are not using them. It can be so easy to leave the lights or TV on when you leave a room, or to leave the tap running when brushing your teeth. Taking responsibility for turning off lights and taps is an easy way in which our children can contribute to conserving the world’s resources (and save money on our energy bills!).

Looking after our planet does not need to be time consuming or costly. Making simple lifestyle changes can have a positive impact on our world. We want the world to be a better place for our children. Helping them look after our natural resources will help them look forward to the future with positivity and hope.

Getting School Ready

As the end of summer looms close, lots of little ones are preparing to start school for the first time. As parents, we want our kids to have the best start to their education, so here are my top teacher tips for getting school ready.

1. Encourage them to become more independent in everyday tasks. Nursery and P1 classrooms can have 25+ children in them with a range of needs. They are busy places! Therefore there is an expectation that the children will be able to complete many tasks independently. Teach your child how to put on their coat and zip it up. Top tip- put it on by putting the hood on your head, then putting in your arms, this makes it much easier for a little one to get on! Teach them to put on their own shoes. You can use a smiley face sticker, cut in half on the inner sole to indicate left and right. Snack time is a very important time in the early years. Teaching your little one to pour their own milk/ water, butter their own toast and clean the dishes will give them a good head start on learning the necessary skills for snack time. Encourage them to cut up their own food and drink from a cup.

2. Encourage early number skills. Teach your child to count to ten. Sing counting songs eg. 10 little speckled frogs, 5 little men, 10 fat sausages- search for ‘counting songs’ on YouTube for lots more ideas! Count everyday objects in your home eg. pasta shells, cups, teddies. Look for numbers around you to develop recognition of numbers eg. on house doors, on food packets. Read stories which focus on numbers eg. The Hungry Caterpillar, Handa’s Surprise.

3. Develop reading readiness. Your child is not expected to be able to read before they start school, however, you can do lots of things to develop the necessary skills which form a foundation to learning to read. Familiarise your child with books and help them develop a love of reading. (See my previous blog on this). Most libraries are free and run lots of events to encourage children to enjoy reading. Sing nursery rhymes and songs to develop phonological awareness (this is an understanding of the sounds which make up words).

4. Develop fine motor skills. Your child will be learning to use a pencil and scissors in school. Give them experience of using these objects at home. They can practise cutting by cutting up old catalogues or magazines. Give them different surfaces to explore drawing on, such as whiteboards, paper, cardboard or even writing in sand. Insist on correct pencil grip and don’t let your child form an incorrect grip. Get them to put their index finger and thumb together, like a little crocodile- snappy fingers. Use this to help them hold their pencil properly.

5. Develop gross motor skills. This will help them with tasks such as putting on their coat. Gross motor skills are fun and easy to develop. It can be as simple as a visit to the park or throwing and catching a ball. Obstacle courses, Simon Says and keeping up a balloon are also great activities to develop gross motor skills.

6. Paint a positive picture of school. Your little one may be more nervous than they seem. Talk about school as a positive place. Look for books or TV programmes which are about starting school eg. Topsy and Tim or CBeeBees Time for School. Don’t use school as a threat for managing behaviour ie. “Wait until your teacher hears how bold you’ve been.” Talk to your child about the school routine, familiarise them with the names of key staff and involve them in choosing a coat, school bag etc to help them get excited about this new start.

Starting school is a huge milestone in your little one’s life. But with good support at home and in school, all children can flourish and enjoy a positive school experience. As parents, it can be so emotional to watch them walk through the classroom door, away from your care. I get a little emotional every time my little one moves to a new class. But having been on the other side of it, I know that your child’s teacher will welcome them with all the care and attention your child needs. So rest easy, they are in safe hands!

Sparking Joy in Reading

Books. We all have a different relationship with them. Some love them, some hate them, some wish they had more time for them. We all know that books are good for our kids, but what happens when our kids just aren’t interested in reading? Here are my top tips to encourage reading at home and in school.

Find reading material of interest.

Children are more likely to engage with anything that is of a topic of interest. Everyday in my class, I have some sort of independent reading time. In my early years of teaching, I taught in a rural, country school. I found that the boys in particular, we not interested in daily silent reading and found this part of the day extremely boring (leaving them prone to disruption). However, I managed to get my hands on a stack of tractor magazines. After this, the boys were racing into the class after lunch to get their chosen magazine and settle down to read. They weren’t necessarily able to read all of the words, but they were excited to read. 

Find books that will make them laugh

Every year I read The Unbelievable Top Secret Diary of Pig by Emer Stamp to my class. It holds no educational value, nor is it linked directly to our curriculum. So why bother? I read it because it is hilarious. I put on a funny voice for all of the different characters and embrace the silly humour, with the book talking about ‘farts’ and ‘poos’ throughout. This leaves the children laughing out loud, looking forward to the next chapter. I’ve lost count of the number of parents who have told me that their child never reads at home but has asked for this series of books to be bought for them. Finding time to read ‘silly’ books to my class, has taught them a valuable lesson - that books can be just as exciting and funny as any Netflix series.

Give the children choice in what they read. 

When I first began teaching in Key Stage 2, I hated teaching reading. Getting the children into a group, constantly reminding the rest of the class to be quiet, going around the circle to listen to each child read, asking them questions about the book (only to discover that they didn’t do their reading homework the night before). It was rarely a positive experience and only made reading feel like a chore. Introducing Accelerated Reader in our school was a game changer. You may have heard of Accelerated Reader in your child’s school, it’s become very popular. Accelerated Reader is a programme that allows the children to choose a book that is at an appropriate level for their ability. The key is that the children choose their own book. They are in charge of what they read (within the boundaries of their level) and this gives them a sense of ownership. Children are more likely to enjoy books which they have chosen to read, rather that being handed a dusty old book, which is likely to be older that their parents. At home, I try to take my son to the library regularly. It can be tempting to pick books which I think look good, but I try to take a step back and let him choose what he wants to read. Most libraries host different events and clubs to engage children and encourage a love of reading.

Intertwine reading into your routine.

In our house, we read the homework reading books every night a tea time. Then at bedtime, we read two stories before lights out. This is a chance for our little one to choose his own book that he wants to enjoy with either of us. Having this woven into our routine, means it can’t be missed. We won’t ‘forget’ to do it, because it’s become a habit. Something to look forward to at the end of a busy day, setting a pattern for years to come.

Occasionally listen to audiobooks.

I enjoy books, but I don’t have an abundance of time to read them. So a few years ago, I took out a subscription to Audible. This allows me to listen to books when I’m walking the dog, ironing or driving. I had gathered up a few credits and decided to use a few on audiobooks for my little one. These have been invaluable. Although he is not physically seeing the words and developing any decoding skills, he is being drawn into stories for pure enjoyment. He’s also developing his listening, attention and concentration skills. He’s excited about listening to his stories and is eager to browse the digital library.

Reading is a necessary skill that is required in almost every aspect of modern life. We need to show children, while they are young, that reading is not a boring chore, only associated with school. I’m not suggesting we throw away the high frequency word cards and guided reading books - these have a very important role in developing the necessary skills required to decode and understand a text. However, what must go hand in hand with the necessary skill-building, is an opportunity to spark the joy that can come from a good book.

Is Rest Really Achievable for Tired Parents?

Before I was a mum, I thought I was busy. I thought I knew what tiredness was. Goodness was I naive! From the moment our little ones come into the world, it becomes very apparent that our lives will never again be our own. After a tiring day of work, I begin my next job; homework, dinner, cleaning up, making packed lunches, bath time and bedtime. And just when you think it’s time for a well deserved rest, there’s the washing, the cleaning, the groceries and the dog walking. The to do list is never-ending!

It can feel like there is no time for rest. We all need it and crave it. But parenting is a non-stop 24/7 job. It seems the only way to truly rest is to get away for a fancy spa weekend - a lovely idea, but hardly realistic! There has to be time in our daily, weekly lives which leave space for rest. How can we meet the needs of our children, yet maintaining our own mental wellbeing and fulfilling our need for rest? I would be lying if I said I had it all sorted, because I don’t. Here are some ideas of how to incorporate rest into your daily life:

Put Your Phone To Bed

Just as we need rest from work and housework, arguably, we need rest from our phones too. I’ve wasted endless evenings scrolling social media, catching up on the latest news, browsing dream holiday destinations and having a nosy at the latest houses to go on the market. I rarely feel well rested and rejuvenated after this. Instead, my head is filled with a million ideas, making it difficult to switch off when I finally get into bed. I look at Instagram and I am bombarded with images of picture perfect families, in picture perfect show homes with not a single basket of laundry in sight. Instead of winding down, anxiety is setting in, as I mull over how I could never measure up to their unattainable standards. The blue light on screens can also negatively impact our ability to sleep, throwing our natural body clock, out of rhythm - bad news for those in need of rest! What if we put our phones to bed when we put our kids to bed? Resist the urge to reach for it and choose to do something which will contribute positively to your well-being. For me, this takes real discipline, but the results are well worth it. 

Find Time For Something You Love

It’s natural to become so consumed with the needs of our children, that we can neglect the things we love. The daily tasks associated with parenting can become monotonous and repetitive. Having a hobby is an ideal way to wind down and rest your mind. This could be running, baking, crafting, reading… basically, anything you love! To make it a priority and make sure it happens, you need to be intentional in scheduling it. If you wait until you have completed all of your other chores, it will never happen! I swim 2-3 times per week. I need to go super early in the morning before everyone is up to fit it in. I don’t always feel like going, I am not a morning person at all, but I have developed a discipline in going. After my swims, I feel awake, alert and a little less stressed, ready to take on a demanding day. Although I am a parent, I am not only a parent. Doing the things I love, helps me to hold onto who I am. I may not have as much time for them, but I need to purposeful in making time for them.

Have a Defined Family Rest Time

In the Bible, the Israelites practiced ‘sabbath’. This word may have old fashioned, out of date connotations for you, but bear with me. Whether you have faith or not, I think we can all agree that rest is a human necessity. We all have our limitations and we all need rest. Sabbath was a clearly defined 24 hour period where work ceased and people were expected to rest. We have tried to adopt this into the ethos of our home from Saturday evening until Sunday evening. This does not mean that we simply stop parenting during these 24 hours, far from it. Our home simply takes on a different rhythm. We begin with a family meal on Saturday evening (usually our family favourite - pizza). Following this, we have family movie night, no mobile phones allowed. Sunday morning and afternoon are slower paced than the rest of the week. We prioritise meeting with family, walks, cycles and ice cream. We steer clear of non-urgent work during this time. That means no laundry, no ironing, no cleaning, no checking emails - it can wait. Sure, it takes a certain degree of organisation to achieve this, but as we have developed this discipline in our home, our family bond has become stronger and we in turn, have been better rested, equipped to take on a new week.

Shake Off The Mum Guilt

When I take time off, do something on my own or pause the housework in aid of rest, it doesn’t take very long for the mum guilt to sneak in. I feel like I must always be doing something productive for my family, otherwise I am not a good enough mum; that by resting, I am somehow neglecting the needs of my family. I am learning to shake off this attitude. In order to give the best to my family, I need to also give the best to myself. This is not selfish or lazy, but in the right balance, it is necessary. Children’s author Carol McCloud, talks about being a ‘bucket filler’. She views our wellbeing as being a ‘bucket’. We contribute to our children’s ‘buckets’ through the love and nurture which we give. Buckets cannot be filled from empty buckets. Taking care of our own wellbeing is not lazy. It is not selfish. It is necessary for the wellbeing of our whole family.

Rest can seem like a distant dream for many parents. We often yearn for our younger days when a good night’s sleep was taken for granted and our alarm clocks were set a little later. But rest is not unachievable for parents. We don’t have an abundance of it, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have any. In order to achieve it, we must be purposeful and intentional in achieving it. In doing so both we and our families will reap the rewards.

Table Time - Carving Out the Most Precious Time of the Day

I teach full time. The day is busy and emotionally draining. When I get home from work, all I want to do is put my feet up. If only! Instead I'm thrown headfirst into homeworks, making dinner and preparing lunches for the next day. Family life is hectic!

Sitting at the kitchen island in the middle of it all is my son. He hasn't seen me since this morning. Finally we are home together, but his mum is rushing around trying to sort all of the necessary things. Where is the time for him? Busy lifestyles mean we yearn for convenience. It would be easier to just grab a quick bite in the midst of the hustle and bustle. But in doing so, we miss out vital table time.

The dinner table is a precious place in our house. At dinner time, we sit around the table. We put away phones and our son knows to scold those who try to bring phones to the table (even his extended family)! It is a time for talking. For being together. For sharing the ups and downs of our day together. The idea of family time around the table sounds lovely. Perhaps a bit idealistic? Let me be honest with you, it is not as Insta-perfect as it sounds! We are constantly dishing out reminders to stay in the seat and to eat up. There are spills, things fall on the floor and food that has been lovingly prepared is sometimes refused! There are tears, there are huffs and there are occasional stressful moments! I hear stories about people who feed the kids then have a proper sit down meal with their other half when the kids are tucked up in bed. This is tempting for sure and we do this occasionally when we have a date night. But to do this every night, would take away a central family experience. Table time is a messy experience, but also a beautiful one.

Table time allows us to talk; to really talk. Our best conversations as a family, happen when we are around the table, with no other motive than to be together. Once established, table time gives kids a safe space to talk about things which are bothering them. In a world where teenage anxiety is on the increase, they need a place where they know they will be listened to and valued. They know this time is marked out for them and won't be disrupted by external things. For the little ones, it develops good conversation skills through listening to others talk and learning not to interrupt.

Independence skills are learned at the dinner table. This is where you can best model table manners to your child such as using a knife and fork, saying "please" and "thank you" and staying in your seat until everyone is finished. This can be so frustrating in the little years and can make dinner time feel stressful. But the benefits far outweigh the difficulties. Focus on the bigger picture. Putting in the time to developing good table manners when children are little, will pay off massively in the years to come.

Here are 6 ways to develop table time in your home:

1. Time block your dinner time. Make sure there is clearly defined, protected time for your table time. Even if you can't manage it everyday, aim for a few dinners together each week. Define a set amount of time for dinner to give unhindered time to table time. There is nothing worse than having dinner when someone at the table is rushing their food to get to a meeting or an event.

2. Have a no technology rule. Table time is family time. You cannot be fully focused on family while focusing on a screen. If you are looking at the top of the head of the person opposite you, they are not fully engaging with you. It sends an unsaid message that they do not value spending time with you. As tempting as it may be, try to avoid bringing an iPad to restaurants. We want to teach our children good table manners and that starts now. Children who think it's ok to watch Netflix at dinner, will grow into teenagers who think it's ok to Snapchat at dinner and will grow into adults who think it's ok to scroll Facebook at dinner.

3. Encourage positive conversation at the dinner table. It is not a time to bring up your child's temper tantrum earlier in the day, or to argue about a contentious issue. If something negative comes up in the conversation, agree to park it, to be discussed at another time. Talk to your kids about their day. Share something about your day. Spend the time wisely by working on your relationship. The dinner table should be a place where kids know they are valued and listened to.

4. Involve the whole family in the preparation. Children need to understand and value the work that goes into a family meal. It should not be a one-man-band, but a team effort. Depending on their age, involve them in setting the table, preparing the vegetables, pouring drinks or clearing up afterwards.

5. Be consistent. To have real and lasting impact, table time cannot be a random event, or one which is reserved for special occasions. To have true authenticity, it must be woven into the weekly routine of family life. What you prioritise will reveal what you value most in life.

6. Welcome others to your table. We need to teach our children to be hospitable to others. I often think, "I'll invite people round when the house is a bit tidier/ when I'm less busy/ when I'm off work." Hospitality does not need to come with bells and whistles on. Inviting others into your home regardless of the mess, teaches our children to be kind to others, to put someone else's needs before their own.

Carving out time for family meals can be a challenge. I would be lying if I said that every meal in my home is a beautiful picture of everyone eating delicious homemade food over good conversation. But I wouldn't change anything about it. Family life isn't perfect, but it is precious. I want to capture as much time as possible with my family right now, as we are, around our tiny little dining table.

Is Ranking Children in the Class Really Helpful?

“Where are they in the class?” A question I regularly get asked by parents. Answering this question isn’t as easy as you might think. Of course as parents, we want to know how our children are doing in their schoolwork. But are we asking the right questions?

I could tell you that your child is in my top maths group. I’m sure hearing this might make you feel good and give you a bit of reassurance. But in a different group of children, in a different year, the same child at the same ability level, could have been in my second maths group. It’s all relative to the other children in the class.

When we compare our children to the progress of other children, what do we achieve? If our child is doing ‘well’, we might give ourselves a pat on the back, a reassurance that we are doing a good job as parents. If someone else’s child is doing better, we might feel deflated, that our children just aren’t doing good enough, that we as parents aren't doing enough. We ramp up the pressure and it all falls heavily on the shoulders of our little ones. What does this say to our children? They aren’t as good as someone else. The don’t measure up. Their best isn’t good enough. You might think that comparing them to their peers will spur them on, give them to motivation to improve. However, it's more likely to do a lot of emotional damage, waging war against their confidence and self-esteem.

So perhaps the questions we are asking need to change. Instead of asking, “Where are they in the class?” we should be asking, “Are they achieving their potential?” “Are they performing at their best?” “What are the struggling with and how can I help?”

Usually from Key Stage 1, your children’s teachers will be testing the children’s intelligence with a non-verbal reasoning test. These give an indicator of what your child is capable of. Then when your child does testing in literacy and numeracy, these scores are compared to the intelligence score, to see if they are achieving their full potential.  So the only comparison is with themselves. Your child’s attainment is irrelevant to what someone else in the class is attaining. 

Once we start thinking this way, it eradicates the need to rank and compare children. What matters, is your child as an individual. As long as they are performing at their own best level, that’s all that matters.

But what if your child isn’t performing at their potential? Have a chat with your child’s teacher. They can see where the gaps in their learning are and what needs improvement. It could be that they found test conditions difficult; no one enjoys exams and for young children, this is a new and scary experience. Remember, a test is only a reflection on what a child did on one particular day. It is not the be all and end all. If your child is consistently struggling and you think they may need further assessment or intervention, ask to speak to the school SENCo (Special Educational Needs Coordinator), who can advise you on the way forward. 

Every child is an individual, therefore we cannot look at each one through the same lens. Imagine a handful of corn in a pan. They are all heated at the same temperature, under the same conditions, yet each one explodes into popcorn at different rates. The same is true with children’s learning. One child may take to reading like a duck to water. Others may take a bit longer to find their feet. Comparing our children to others, is unhelpful, unfair and damaging to both them and us. So keep your eyes fixed on your child. If the neighbour’s kids are aces at times tables, good for them. Your child will find their niche, in their own time. Make sure you have your focus on them, ready to dish out the high fives when they achieve those little goals. 

Building Resilient Kids

Anxiety: a word we hear everywhere at the moment. Many people attribute this to Covid 19. Although it’s true that Covid has certainly played its part, I think there was a problem long before Covid reared its head. 

In the classroom, there is an evident increasing lack of ability to cope with life’s normal stressors. Whether it is a spelling test or a challenging maths problem, some children can go to pieces at the very thought of facing a pressurised task. In the eight years that I have been teaching, there has been a distinct increase in the number of tears shed over everyday mundane classroom tasks. My job has become as much about emotional learning as it is about curriculum learning. 

The thing that children desperately need is resilience. Resilience is the trampoline that helps us bounce back when the hard stuff hits us. Resilience is what allows us to take risks knowing that it’s ok to make a mistake.  Resilience is what makes us look at the broken pieces and have the strength to start piecing it all back together.  We often hear people say, “Children are resilient”. However, children are not born with superhero strength resilience. Resilience must be learned. It’s not an easy thing to learn, it’s incredibly tough. But this learning is what will make our children into strong resilient adults, ready to face whatever life throws at them.

As parents, we want to do everything in our power to make life an easy road for our kids. We lose sleep worrying about them when things aren’t going well and we will move heaven and earth to help them avoid unnecessary pain or distress. We want to wrap them up in cotton wool, to keep them close and we will fiercely fight off anything that threatens to stand in their way. 

But when we overprotect our children, we do them a disservice. I’m not saying we throw caution to the wind, but we do need to allow our children to face some obstacles. Some pressure, some disappointment, some failure is exactly what our children need to build resilience. The bumps in the road help them to learn to problem-solve, to cope with big emotions and to bounce back well. Our job is not always to fix the problem. Sometimes it is to hold their hand through it, other times it is to take a back seat and let them find their own way through.

Practical Steps to Help Build Your Child’s Resilience:

• Set goals and make a plan to help achieve them. Having something to aim for gives children a purpose, keeps them motivated and makes them more likely to persevere when it gets tough.

• Expose them to positive stress. As adults, we know that life is not always rosy. We will all encounter challenges. Positive stress is what promotes growth, builds determination and gives children the fundamental skills to cope when the bigger stresses come their way. When something breaks, give them the opportunity to work out how to fix it. When they have a fallout with friends or siblings, take a back seat (when appropriate) and let them navigate repairing the relationship. When homework is tricky, encourage them to ‘have a go’ before swooping in to explain it. Encourage them to take healthy risks, which will push them beyond their comfort zone, but won’t do them a lot of harm if they fail.

• See the value in failure. So many children are afraid to fail. Help them see that failure is not something we ‘get in trouble’ for, but something we can learn from. Talk about what they can do better next time and how they can improve as a result of their failure. Ask questions to encourage them to problem-solve eg. instead of saying, “Put that Lego brick there,” say, “What shape/ size of brick do you think goes there?” Praise their effort rather than the outcome eg. instead of saying, “Your painting is very beautiful,” say, “I really love how you persevered with this, even when you found it really tricky.”

• Develop positive self-esteem. When children have good self-esteem, they think positively and they are more likely to take risks and try new things. Look for opportunities to praise their character eg. “I loved seeing your kindness when you shared with your brother.”

• Teach your child how to rest well. Our culture nurtures busyness and burnout can easily set in. Children and adults alike, need to learn to take time to rest and recharge. When we are tired and overworked, we don’t have clarity in our thinking, we can start acting based on our emotions and don’t perform at our full potential.

• Develop trusting caring relationships. Strong relationships with caregivers give children the security to make mistakes in a safe environment. Children can trip up, knowing that they won’t be judged and someone will come alongside to help them get back up and cheer them on to try again.

• Model your coping skills. Practically show your children how you cope with adversity, talk to them about times when you have failed and how you have overcome them.

If your child is struggling with developing their resilience, there is hope. Resilience is learned. Even the most fragile children can develop it. It is never too late. It’s always a work in progress. As a parent, your job is to be there for them, cheering them along, assuring them of your unconditional love.

Working Mum Guilt

Career and parenthood. Can we mums really have it all? A thought that plagues me regularly.

Being a working mum is exhausting. Whether you work out of financial necessity or vocational aspirations, mum guilt creeps in constantly. I imagine even stay at home mums know the feelings of mum guilt too. It’s inescapable.

I’ve lost count of the times I’ve lay awake in bed at night thinking, “I didn’t do the reading,” “I forgot to sign that note,” or “I haven’t made the packed lunches.” I often feel like a circus performer, trying to keep all of the plates spinning. And do I drop the plates? Every. Single. Day.

Trying to maintain the delicate balance has caused me to re-evaluate what is important. I’m learning to say, “no” to the unnecessary commitments, to maximise my time with my son, even if that means something as mundane as cutting up the vegetables together for dinner.

Being a mum is woven into my character. It’s who I am. But it’s not the only thing I am. I am still the hard-working, creative woman I was before I became a mum. So rather than abandon these qualities in exchange for motherhood, I choose to weave them through every aspect of my life. This is what I have chosen. It may not be what every mum chooses, and that’s ok. You know what works best for your family, so what works for another family, may not necessarily work for yours.

Working mum or not, being a mother is one of life’s greatest blessings. It isn’t easy, some days are just plain tough. But you’ve got this, you’re doing your best and that’s all you can do. And when you drop the spinning plates, tomorrow’s a brand new day!